My heart is full today. The song, "Great is Thy Faithfulness" keeps going around and around in my head. The Lord has been SO merciful and faithful to me.
Years ago, when yet a single, I would get so discouraged when I saw no potential mate on the horizon. At times, I was peaceful, enjoying being single and the freedom that came with that state in life. At others, I was a basket-case, wondering why NO ONE loved me unconditionally. (Of course, I mean no one other than God.)
One thing was certain - I would not marry anyone who wasn't God's perfect choice for me. I had watched some marriages struggle and fail. I knew I could be happy single but realized that being in a bad (or the wrong) marriage would take a toll on me, the cost of which could not be calculated. I preferred to be happy on and off as a single than miserable in a marriage, so I waited.
My friend, Jane, and I would get together regularly to pray. Around the new year, we would list the big prayers the Lord laid on our hearts in a book she kept in a drawer, then faithfully pray for those requests throughout the course of the next year. Year after year, we saw God honor these prayers and answer them in ways that were unimaginable to us. One year, when we gathered, another single friend, who was in a dating relationship, joined us. After praying for a while, Jane asked the Lord to speak to us, and we stood in silence for several minutes. Then Jane told us that she felt she had a word from the Lord that one of the three of us would be either married or headed towards marriage by the same time the following year. The other single woman confirmed the Word, saying she had heard the same one.
Jane and I both looked at our friend. It seemed pretty clear she was the one who would be marrying soon. We were very excited for her and all rejoiced that one of us would soon be moving into a different season in our lives. Since neither Jane nor I were dating, nor had any possibilities at the time, this all seemed quite reasonable. Our friend also felt she was the one for whom the Word was intended.
Turns out, it was me. Don and I began dating the end of August of the following year and, by the end of December, were very serious and both knew we were headed towards marriage. Both of those friends are still single. I WAS THE ONE that Word was meant for.
Don is God's perfect choice for me. I often say he's perfect; not in a human sense, but certainly perfect for me. Then, he gave me these precious children. Again, there are difficult times when I wonder how I'm going to survive until they're grown, but the good times are SO good that they outweigh the hard times. Don has always been able to provide well for our family, so I've been able to be a stay-at-home Mom, which is one of God's great mercies. I get to go on Field Trips, substitute at the school, drop my children off and pick them up every day. I get to stop by a friend's house for coffee in the morning, hit Wal-Mart at 8:30 when the parking lot is still empty, get yardwork done while it's still relatively cool outside. There are so many more blessings that God has poured out on me; not the least of which is still having both my parents living on the same road as me, two sisters in town that I talk with almost daily, many close friends who love and encourage me, and Alleluia, the Community that the Lord has loved me enough to allow me to be a part of.
Why shouldn't my heart be filled to overflowing? He loves me the most, as my Deanna would say. He loves me in little and big ways. He cares about the small things, like what color I paint the den, and makes His protecting hand clearly visible in large issues, such as my health. He is a great and might God, but not too big to notice even the small things that lay heavy on our hearts.
And isn't that truly what unconditional love is about? To love someone enough that you're concerned even about the seemingly insignificant things that affect them.
God has given me so much, but the greatest miracle, and the one for which I'm the MOST thankful, is that he's shown me HIS unconditional love through husband and children. He really is enough, but it took marriage and a family for me to see that HIS love is the greatest I will ever experience and meets my deepest needs.
Great is Thy faithfulness, O God, my Father!!!
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