Over-committed

We just completed humpday in our Vacation Bible School at our church. It started on Monday morning. I'm helping and needed to be there at 8:30 a.m., requiring us to leave home by 8:00.

As I drag through the week, trying desperately to finish unpacking and doing laundry in the few hours each day I'm home, I kick myself for committing to work immediately following camping for 4 days. I'm a glutton for punishment.

It's not that I can't say "no". It's just that I don't.

When I was younger, I was very quick to pop off the "n" word. But as I've aged and the Lord has filled my spirit with thankfulness for all He's done for me, I'm overwhelmed with a desire to serve him and others whenever possible. The "possible" word is really my problem. I still think I'm 18 and ANYTHING IS POSSIBLE for the young.

So I over-commit myself. I plan too many things for too short a time. I spread myself and my family w-w-w-w-ay too thin.

I've realized over the last 6 months or so, in the process of trying to dig myself out of the holes I've dropped into because I take on too much, that my immediate reaction when asked to do something is always, "Sure!! I can do that." It's not until later, when I take time to think through how I'm going to accomplish it, that I realize I should have said no.

Friends will call and ask if I can possibly keep their children. They kindly explain why they need help and I'm overcome with the need in their lives and the realization that they would do the same for me in an instant, without any thought to their own situation.

"Sure. I can do that," I spout off, then realize that I have my own plus two or three others that I'll be taking to my OB/GYN appointment with me.

I'm joking, of course. It's not usually my OB/GYN - it's my Family Practice doctor. And he ought to understand. After all, he treats families.

Or someone will call and ask if I can cook a meal for a friend who's just had a baby or is on bedrest. How many meals were prepared for me during and after my pregnancies by caring friends?

"Sure. I can do that," I quickly respond, only later realizing that I'm hosting a potluck in my backyard the same night, starting an hour before the meal is to be delivered to my friend and requiring several hours of set-up prior to my guests arriving.

The problem isn't related to lack of knowledge or not checking my calendar. I look at the dates, see what's listed already for then, and briskly ascertain that another thing is CERTAINLY possible - if I plan well, if I prepare in advance, if I take along lots of toys.

So my husband patiently waits for his dinner. The children dig through the dryer looking for clean underwear. And I stay up until 11:30 folding clothes and putting away paper plates and plasticware as I carefully unpack each bag.

By the end of the week, I should be caught up. And by the time VBS is over, I'm sure I'll think it was well worth the strain and effort.

After all, nothing worth having comes cheaply, I keep reminding myself.