What's the name of that game?

We stopped at a Cracker Barrel for lunch on our way home from West Virginia. We all love Cracker Barrel's food and the boys think the decor is cool. As soon as we sat down, Dane asked if he could go play checkers.

"You need to order FIRST," I told him, shoving a menu in front of him.

Daelyn: "What's that thing we always have? I'll have that."

Me: "Which thing we always have? Hash brown casserole?"

Daelyn: "No. That round thing."

Me: "Waffle?"

Daelyn: "Yeah! I want a waffle."

Don and I simultaneously glanced at our menus. No waffles. Only pancakes. We prompted Daelyn again and asked if he wanted pecan or plain pancakes. After getting a hard-fought answer, we turned our attention to Dane again.

"What do you want to eat," I asked him.

"Can I go play checkers?"

I sighed. Some days, I'm not sure we speak the same language as our children.

"You have to order FIRST," I explained again. "What would you like to eat?"

"Egg and bacon," he responded. All these luscious foods and he wants the same thing I make him at home.

"Do you want a biscuit with it?" Dane nodded affirmatively and I released him and Daelyn to go play on the checkerboard in front of the now-empty fireplace.

Don and I were looking over our menus and discussing whether to order breakfast or lunch when Daelyn returned looking upset.

"Daddy, I need to ask you a question privately."

"Ask me here, son. Just say it out."

"It's about chest. I need to know if I can do something in chest. Aren't you a chest expert?"

Don's eyes began to sparkle and he grinned.

"Nope," he said. "Ask Mommy. She's the chest expert."

"I may be the chest expert," I told Daelyn, "but you're not playing 'chest'. You're playing checkers, and Daddy's the checkers expert."

I grinned back at Don and caught him casually glancing at my 'chest'. Eyes up, my darling. The boys are playing checkers.

Scheduling

We went to visit my in-law's in West Virginia this weekend. We always have a wonderful time there. They spoil the children and Don and I and it's very relaxed and restful.

Don hadn't seen his parents in quite some time. While I'm very committed to taking my children to see their grandparents, it's often while Don is working and can't get away. I begged him to make some time this summer to visit them.

We left Deanna behind. She'll be spending this week alone with her grandparents. We left around 7:30 yesterday morning for our homeward trek and walked through our kitchen door a little after 6 p.m. We hadn't been home 5 minutes when the phone began to ring. It was Deanna.

"Hi, Mom," she said, very perky. "Uh, oh," I thought. She was really struggling the night before we left and Don and I both spent time alone with her. While she loves being with her grandparents and really looks forward to it every summer, she's also a homebody and doesn't like being away from me and her daddy.

"Hi, sweetie. You almost missed us. We JUST got home. Is everything alright?"

"Yep. I just wanted to call and say hi." I was still afraid there was some problem that was being masked by cheerfulness, so I prompted her a little.

"What'd you do today, sweetie?"

"Oh, Grandma and I went to Crafts 2000 (an awesome crafts outlet store that we went to on Sunday afternoon - all of us, the whole family), I worked on . . . "

She went on and on and on and on about all they had done in one short day. She and Grandma had done this, she and Grandpa had done that. "Oh, and, by the way, the book that Grandpa wrote that has our pictures in it arrived today and I got to see the whole book. It was awesome . . . " on and on.

"I asked Grandma if I'm talking more this time and she said, 'You sure are. Did your mother talk to you?'" Deanna goes ever summer and never speaks to her grandparents. They are naturally quiet people and if YOU don't initiate a conversation, there likely won't be any. I've been trying to teach Deanna for several years how to relate to her quiet grandparents. It seems this year she's finally secure enough to talk to them and is REALLY enjoying herself. She's probably talking their ears off, but she feels like she's getting to know them better and I'm quite certain they're getting to know her better.

"Honey, Daelyn's crying. Something's happened and I need to go. Can we call you back after the van is unpacked so Daddy can talk to you?"

"Well, I called early because I'm planning on watching a movie from 7 to 9. Grandma and I looked it up in the tv schedule and she said I could stay up to watch it, so I'm trying to get everything done before 7:00 so there's no interruptions."

It finally cut through my fog. She wasn't lonely. She didn't even really need to talk to me. She's having a wonderful time. But she knew I'd call to tell her goodnight and want to hear all about her day, so she pre-empted me so she wouldn't be disturbed during her "planned evening". My heart jumped a little when I realized my little girl is growing up. She's more secure than she's ever been, having a great time away from home, making sure she meets her commitment to me while scheduling her time to optimize her fun. I giggled a little thinking about it.

"I guess I could run and take my shower now so I'll be done in time to talk to Daddy before my movie starts," she said. It seemed a very clear directive to me. Hang up now, Mom, and have Daddy call prior to 7, please.

We'd hate to interrupt her movie.

Last Weekend

Last Saturday was Dane's 9th birthday. He hasn't had a party with his friends since he was 4, so we decided it was time to throw "the big one". It seems we're always on vacation or at Grandma and Grandpa's when his birthday rolls around and it just gets a minor nod from the family.

We invited, secretly, all the boys in Dane's class to a surprise party the day before. We all gathered at a warehouse that rents out inflatables and has several operating all day in their warehouse. For a flat price per child, they could jump to their heart's content for two hours, which they did. I packed along a cooler with chilled drinks for the hot and sweaty jumpers. Then I loaded them all up in a borrowed van (all 13 of them) and took them back to our yard where Don met us. We had put the awning up the previous evening and moved the deck table underneath it, finding some lame excuse for Dane, which he willingly accepted. Don had Papa John's pizza for everyone and we ate, then had cake and ice cream and opened presents.

Dane was thrilled and all the boys seemed to have fun. It's a birthday he won't soon forget.

On Saturday, his actual birthday, we went to Six Flags as a family. The children all had free tickets because of a fund-raiser in which they participated during the year, and Don and I managed to get discounted tickets. We rode rides, changed into bathing suits and played in the water park, then rode more rides until the park closed. We stopped at the nearest fast food restaurant to the Park on the way home for dinner and the children changed into pajamas and were sound asleep in minutes. We got home around 1:30 a.m., just in time to begin celebrating Father's Day.

It really was a great time. We felt so blessed. We all were in agreement about what rides we wanted to try and stayed together the whole day, moving from one fun activity to the next, satisfying everyone's sense of adventure. Daelyn got to drive his own bumper car, which made his day, and Dane and Deanna got to try out some fun roller coasters, not to mention the awesome slides at the Water Park. No one got sunburned, we were having too much fun to stop and eat, but we took the time to split a funnel cake and savor the moment (and the powdered sugar).

Traveling with Don just gets better the longer we're married. And the children really seem to want to meet each other's needs. As with the rest of our summer, it just felt magical.

On the way home, fighting the construction on the highway in Augusta, Don missed our turn-off and, in an attempt to double back, ended WAY off course. Deanna woke up and asked where we were. We tried to explain but she finally got the picture and began to laugh. I looked over at Don and, even in the darkness, I could see his eyes twinkle.

"So, honey, do you think you'll be able to find our driveway," I kidded.

"I'm not sure," he responded. "I may need to drive around the block a few times."

If I ever, momentarily, forget why I married this man, days like this bring it all back. Not only did he give me these wonderful children, whom I love to be with, but I can't imagine anyone else in the world with whom I'd rather grow old.

I'm not sure it felt much like Father's Day on Sunday, but Saturday felt a lot like Mother's Day.

Dropping Like Flies

It's been an interesting week. Deanna's doing volleyball camp each afternoon, then we leave by 5:30 for Vacation Bible School. I've been working in Crafts and am having a wonderful time. This is, by far, the best fit I've yet found in the VBS World. I'm doing detail work with the children, setting up, and cleaning up, basically organizing. No discipline is necessary, no herding, and no losing my temper and having to try and figure out how to deal with another person's child that's not being raised the way I raise mine.

Sunday night we made lab coats from pillow cases. Monday night, we did Shrinky Dinks of all the characters we're meeting in our VBS. Deanna helped with the skit on Monday, so I brought a sheet of Shrinky Dinks home for her and one for me. We spend part of the day on Tuesday doing that.

Dane began complaining on Monday of his throat hurting. No redness, but by Tuesday morning, he was running a low-grade fever, which has continued. No VBS for him, and I've had to make other arrangements. He has an appointment with the Pediatrician this morning for a strept test - sore throat, nausea, fever . . . classic symptoms. But his throat still isn't red. We'll see what the doctor says, but I wanted to get him checked out before we leave this weekend to take Deanna to her grandparents for the week.

Around 5 p.m. yesterday, I was on the phone with the doctor's office scheduling Dane's appointment for today when he walked in with Daelyn and tried to get my attention. I had him wait until I got off the phone, then responded,

"What do you need, son?"

"Mama, Daelyn's having an allergic reaction," he said, and showed me the inside of Daelyn's elbow where there was a small cluster of bug bites.

"They're just bug bites, hon. They look so red because Daelyn's been scratching them," I explained to the patient older brother.

"But they're on the back of his arm, too," he added. I snatched Daelyn's arm, turned it over, and . . . sure enough. Red bumps going all the way up his arm, but concentrated at the elbow.

I pulled out the Benadryl Gel I had just picked up at Wal-Mart this week and began to rub it on the spots. Since they extended under the sleeve of his shirt, I suggested he remove his shirt, which he did.

Welts. All over his chest and back. And both arms were covered, not just the one I was looking at. I got a little panicy. I gave him a quick dose of liquid Benadryl, then called for Deanna.

"Take Daelyn up to Grandma's, please," I asked. I was in the middle of making dinner in the Fry Daddy and couldn't leave, but Grandma always knows what to do.

Daelyn slept well last night, and the welts on his torso are gone, but his arms still look bad. I have no idea what he got into, but there was no VBS for anyone last night.

Let's hope Deanna stays healthy.

Like Minds

Don and I have been thinking about moving. We've looked at a house that's for sale just a couple of blocks away several times and I'm very interested. Don, however, isn't. He can't really express to me why not. I think it just must not be the right timing for him.

Although we love our house, especially after gutting, redesigning, and adding on, we've never liked the location. We are on a very busy road and can't allow the chidren in the front yard. Three or four times since I've lived in this house people have driven through our front yard. We have crepe myrtle trees (3) on the easement between the sidewalk and the street and they've been taken out twice, once on purpose by some twisted individual who spent their evenings driving through yards in our neighborhood. Another time, a woman went into diabetic shock while driving and plowed through our front yard and my neighbors, only coming to a halt when she hit a Stop sign. We live just south of a dangerous curve and drivers seem to lose control coming out of the curve and end up in yards further up the street or ours, mostly on the weekends, and often late at night with the involvement of alcohol.

Anyway, over the years we've looked at several different homes near ours and none have interested us. This one, however, really grabbed my attention and the children fell in love with it. The owners want far too much, WAY more than the appraised value, and the amount I wanted to offer was about half of their asking price but fairly close to the appraised value. Don finally said no and we've laid that down. Until the other day.

Don and I were talking about possible other options. I had heard through the grapevine that the house which held my interest may have been purchased by a family we know and I mentioned it to Don. But I had driven by and there was no sign up indicating it was under contract.

"Maybe it didn't sell and, if it sits there long enough, maybe the owners will become more realistic about the price and we can think about it again," my husband dropped on me like a bombshell.

"Does this mean you might be interested if the price was lower?" I quizzed him, shocked that it might still be a possibility.

"We'll see. But price point was definitely a problem for me," he responded.

The next morning, I told the children at breakfast about the conversation with their daddy the night before.

"Who knows?" I told them. "Maybe the price will come down and then we can talk turkey."

"Instead of talking trash?" Daelyn asked.

That boy thinks far too much like his father.

Mercy Drops

Ah, I love the summer - pool visits, matinees, beach trips, lazy crafts afternoons.

Today, the children and I got our chores done early, then headed to the 10 a.m. free matinee at the local theater. We had a wonderful time and saw a movie we've never seen, then used free kid's meal coupons that they received for memorizing their monthly scriptures the entire school year and had lunch at Chick-fil-A before hitting the semi-annual Bath and Body Works sale.

We got home, changed clothes, and scooted over to a friend's house to enjoy her pool. Tons of my friends were there and the children had classmates to enjoy. It was glorious.

We headed home and, while I fired up the gas grill so I could cook our Bratwurst, they ran and took baths and showers (without being told, I might add). Then Daelyn set the table and Dane walked the dog. Dinner was ready just about the time Don made an appearance from work.

Last night, after our peaceful evening, I read quietly to Daelyn while Dane looked on. Tonight, however, Daelyn said he didn't feel like a book. Instead, he and Dane are sitting on the loveseat doing something - together - with no fussing, fighting or arguing.

The movie we saw today was "Evan Almighty". There was one objectionable scene (the main character's young son is telling his father about the genitalia of some type of duck and, as a friend mentioned to me at the pool, just in case you miss it the first time, they repeat it later) which was totally unnecessary, but, other than that, it was a wonderful movie. One of my favorite parts was when Evan's wife has taken the children and left her husband, thinking he's out of his mind. She stops at a Diner to eat and a news report about her husband is playing on the T.V. She hangs her head in shame when the waiter, whose nametag says "Al Mighty" and who is the actor who plays God in the movie, sits down next to her and encourages her to tell him her troubles.

He says, "What do you think happens when you pray for your family to get closer? Do you think God just magically makes it happen? Or does he give you situations in your life that force you to need each other, to depend on each other?" Obviously, this is paraphrased, because I don't remember his exact words, but it's very nearly what I just said. She goes back to her husband and the family does draw closer, as she prayed in the beginning of the movie.

I feel like that's what's happening to us this summer. Although we're only 1 1/2 weeks into our summer vacation, I feel more in love with my children, the house is getting put in order, and they're getting along better then they ever have. Maybe it's necessity or maybe they actually have less free time because we're staying very active. In any case, they're enjoying each other and I'm enjoying them, and the days are clicking by at a peaceful, I-don't-want-this-to-ever-end pace.

At the pool today, there was some thunder and soft rain fell lightly for a few minutes. Most of us drug our children out of the pool just to be careful, but I couldn't help but think how much it reminds me of God's drops of mercy. This Blog is entitled "Mercy Drops Falling" because I so often feel his mercy falling on me, like that soft rain from Heaven.

I hope his mercy will continue to fall all summer. That kind of rain is the best I can hope for.

Travels

We had a wonderful time at Hilton Head yesterday. We went to the pool during the heat of the day (it was partially shaded), then had a big lunch including boiled shrimp. We planned to head to the beach late afternoon and into the evening.

Low tide was around 4 p.m. The beach was practically empty as families headed home to eat. The sun was beginning to dip and a nice breeze made the heat quite palatable. We put my friends' baby on the edge of a tidal pool so he could splash around in the water, set up chairs, and watched the children as they ran in the surf, trying to catch a good ride on their boogy boards. It was so nice, we chose to stay very late - until 7:30. About 6:30, the waves picked up and the children were really enjoying themselves. We finally drug them out of the water and headed back to Kelly's condo for showers, a quick sandwich dinner, and to pack up.

We got home right at midnight. I told Don to leave everything in the van until morning - no need to waste valuable sleep time unloading, and there was nothing that couldn't keep until morning. As Don took the puppy out to tinkle and I herded children through medicines and towards bed, I noticed several messages on the answering machine.

One was a neighbor whose house is actually behind my parents.

"Patti," she said, "we've found your turtle. He showed up at our house. I don't know if you'll be able to catch us before we leave, but he's here."

I was thrilled. I don't plan on dragging Turtle-y back to his gardenia house, but I knew his hatching grounds had to be somewhere close by since he was first found by my parents and I was hoping someone would call and report his whereabouts.

Someone has. Thank you, Heather. While we were traveling yesterday, so was our little turtle.

...Do!

About two weeks before the end of school, Dane asked me to cut his hair. It had gotten quite long and was unruly. It took me a couple of days to pull out the clippers, but I gave him a nice, boy cut. Daelyn refused a haircut and since his hair wasn't quite as sloppy and long, I decided to let him slide. We've been so busy having fun (and doing chores) this week that his hair hasn't been touched.

Today, we're going to the beach for the day. Some close friends are there this whole week so we're going down to visit. Dane and Daelyn both have friends in the family we're visiting and Deanna is taking a friend with her. The kids have been very excited about their first beach trip this summer.

I packed the van last night, then set my alarm for 6:40, the time I rise during the school year. Don is a much earlier riser and is gone for work by about 5:30.

Before my alarm sounded this morning, I heard the back door open (the kitchen is next to our bedroom) and excited voices at the van. The boys were obviously up and rearing to go. I took off my breathing mask, flipped off the alarm, and jumped out of bed.

"I'll finish packing the coolers first," I told myself, and headed for the kitchen. As I pulled Gatorade and water bottles out of the freezers and began loading them in coolers, Daelyn ran up to me.

"Good morning, Mommy!" he practically shouted. I glanced at him. He had hair horns poking out both sides of his head. Apparently, he had slept quite soundly and his hair this morning proved it.

As if in response to my thoughts and quite pleased with himself, Daelyn announced, "I went to bed last night, woke up this morning, and I had this hair-do!"

Days Gone By

I realize I'm risking sounding a little wacko, but I'm plunging ahead, anyway.

About two weeks ago, I was craving a Cola Icee. You know, like the ones we used to scarf up when we were children. They always had several flavors, but Cola was my favorite. You'd suck until the straw was empty and there was a little hole in your Icee all the way down to the bottom of the cup. Then you'd have to move your straw and repeat this exercise over and over. Eventually, the Icee would be sloshy enough that you could shake the cup and the holes would all fill in. I didn't think my daughter had ever had an Icee and I wanted desperately to introduce her to this childhood activity.

We drove well out of our way to stop at a convenience store, after trying all the ones ON our way. I finally couldn't justify using anymore gas and none of the stores we patronized carried old-fashioned Icee's.

Yesterday, as I was checking out at the Wholesale Club, I realized that I was very thirsty and assumed the children were, also. I glanced up at the little snack bar area and saw a sign,"Icee - $1.09 SMALL, $1.39 MEDIUM, $1.79 LARGE. I gave Deanna a $5 bill and sent her and the boys to get a drink. They met me just as I finished paying and was pushing the buggy towards the door.

"What'd you get?" I asked.

"Icee's, Mom," Deanna nearly shouted at me. I smiled, thrilled that they were all getting to try this treat.

"What flavor?" I asked each child in turn.

"Cola", "Cola", "Cola", they all chimed. Their Icee cups were huge and, just as I reached for mine, I realized I hadn't asked Deanna to get one for me. All three of the children had Cola Icees and there was none for me. Deanna noticed the look on my face.

"What's wrong?" she asked. She's such a kind, sensitive person. I explained that I had forgotten to have her get one for me.

"I'll go back and get in line and get you one," she said. But the line had suddenly gotten long and we needed to get on our way. The kids hadn't yet had lunch and it was almost 2:00.

"No, honey, it'll be okay," I responded. She quickly offered me a sip of hers. Heaven. I had forgotten how perfectly cold a Cola Icee is.

Each child gave me a sip (one very grudgingly, who had to be reminded whose money paid for the Icee's) and that was enough to tide me over. I watched as they each took large slurps and smiled at the many memories those slurps held for me.

We loaded the groceries in the van and headed out of the parking lot. It was quiet except for the sound of sucking when Dane commented,

"Hey, look, everybody, there's a hole in my drink all the way down to the bottom of the cup."

God-update

On the way home from yesterday's matinee, we passed Daelyn's godparent's house (I told you, it's right on the main road home from ALMOST anywhere).

Daelyn: "There's my god-mommy's house, and my god-daddy's house, and my god-doggie's house. Essentially (I didn't know he even knew this word), Mommy, that's my god-house."

And, an update on chores. Deanna has decided to stricken the word "bored" from her vocabulary. She has vehemently expressed to me that she will NEVER AGAIN use that word.

Life is so fun and interesting, after all.

Dane's take on Movie Ratings

"Mr. Bean's Holiday" is playing at the Children's Free Film Festival today. In trying to decide whether or not to give it a go, we looked it up on pluggedinonline.com, a website recommended by Focus on the Family.

The website gave a glowing report. Under the heading, "Sexual Content", it said a prom-style, off-the-shoulder dress worn by a French actress was the worst of it. For violence, a young boy slaps Bean across the face in anger, which later becomes their method of greeting and is used several times. Negative aspects include Bean "stealing" a bicycle and a decrepid scooter. It seems that the worst of the movie is the fact that this stranger attempts to help a young boy, something we find shocking in today's world.

Deanna was reading the review over my shoulder and asked, "What's it rated?"

"G," I responded.

Dane, over my other shoulder: "G? What does that mean? Goofy?"

Moving On

It appears Turtle-y really is gone. But I did a little research on him prior to his departure.

Turtle-y is a male Eastern Box Turtle which, interestingly, is the state reptile of North Carolina. They typically live for 25 to 30 years but there have been plenty of documented cases of them living 50 years.

My research also indicated that they have a strong homing instinct that compels them to return to the area from which they were hatched. After reading this, I was a little surprised that he had stuck around as long as he did.

When telling my father about the lifespan and homing instinct, he suggested I take some spray paint or nail polish and put our phone number on his back. Late that night, I drug Turtle-y out of his sleeping area and, using my silver Sharpie, put his name, our phone number, and family name on his shell. I didn't realize that his shell wasn't solid. It had breaks like cracks in a sidewalk where each panel ended, so it might be a little difficult to read, thus our family name. Then I gently replaced him in his burrowed bed and went to bed myself. The next morning, he was gone.

Perhaps he was rebelling against being woken during the night. Or maybe he was angry with me painting up his shell and decided to teach me a less0n. But maybe, just maybe, that homing instinct kicked in and he headed for parts unknown.

I'm not depressed this time. I am very hopeful that he's gone in search of a female for courting and one day one of Turtle-y's offspring will show up in the yard. Also, my research convinced me all-the-more that Turtle-y needed to be free. Below is a quote from the website I found that explains the problem with keeping an Eastern Box Turtle captive.

"Although box turtles are still fairly common over much of their range, their future is uncertain. Box turtles are slow growing, have few young, and have exhibited delayed sexual maturity. These qualities make them particularly susceptible to damage due to human activities. Another concern is the capture of box turtles for the pet trade. The impact of taking turtles from the wild can be devastating to local populations. When box turtles that have been taken as pets are returned to the wild, they will head straight for their natal grounds. This journey causes the turtles to encounter many dangers, such as roads, predators, and humans. For these reasons, if you are looking for a pet, you should try to find a captive-bred animal or consider a different pet."

Turtle-y, wherever you are, we love you and would welcome you back at any time. But live and make babies, and keep Eastern Box Turtles from becoming extinct, my little friend.

The gardenias will always be waiting for you.

Groaning

I'm getting a little flack from the 11-year old female in our house about my plan for the summer.

Each morning, the children must do their routine chores, then we tackle some other job. Yesterday, it was cleaning off the microwave stand and all the children's school refuse as well as cleaning out the boys' closet while Deanna worked on her bedroom. Today we tackled cleaning their mirrored closet doors, the inside and out of the storm door, all mirrors, and the windows.

The boys pleasantly worked, knowing that good things await those who work hard. They ooh-ed and aah-ed at how much better their closet doors looked and seemed to really enjoy the cleaning chores. The little girl, however, fought me tooth and nail.

Later, while at Pizza Hut (the good thing that awaited them), I explained to her what the boys already understood but she seemed to have missed - my plan for putting order into the house. She made some caustic remark that only teenagers seem to be able to think up.

When we got home from a busy day (dentist's appointment, shopping at a Wholesale Club where we ran into HER godparents, lunch at Pizza Hut, then some fun errands), it was close to 4:00. The boys ran out to play, but she asked to watch TV, which I allowed and, later, to play on the computer, which I also allowed, while I tore apart my Crafts Room to reorganize it. While saying the blessing at dinner shortly after 6:00 (please note that we're talking only two hours after she began watching TV and playing on the computer), she asked the Lord to bless our summer since she was "bored out of our heads today."

She won't be bored tomorrow. I'm planning on spending this evening thinking up about 60 deep cleaning tasks for her to tackle tomorrow to keep her from being bored.

There are some things you just don't say to a Mom - especially not on only the second day of summer.

The Whole God-family

Driving home from the pool today, we passed Daelyn's godparent's house, which is near ours but on a main road.

"Who lives in that house back there on the hill?" he asked coyly.

"You know darn well who lives in that house, Daelyn," I responded. "It's your God-mama's house."

"My God-mama AND my God-daddy." A moment's pause. "And my God-doggies."